Adjusting to the Empty Nest

babies4613Today marks the second time in the last 4 months that my husband and I have been “Empty Nesters” for over two consecutive weeks. The first time was in September, when we dropped our son off at his freshman dorm and our daughter returned to her college a few days later. The house all of a sudden seemed very quiet. No jam bands playing in the basement, no piano improv going on the the living room, no late night doors slamming or microwaves and dishes clanking. Our meal sizes had to be adjusted as well. We realized we didn’t need to make such huge portions or we would be forced to eat leftovers for days. And just as we started to settle into our new patterns- our son came home again. He was unhappy with his choice and decide to withdraw. We of course let him come home until he found his way again. After a few months he accepted an offer to work for his uncle across the country. A few days after he moved out, our daughter came home for her winter break. It was great to spend time with her, but again, our pattern was totally disrupted. She returned to school 2 weeks ago and he is still in Texas  so at this point, we are readjusted to our “Empty Nest” lifestyle. We are finding new activities to do together on the weekends and making time for ourselves to take evening classes and socialize with friends. I am enjoying not having to coordinate schedules for everyone and be a little more spontaneous. Hopefully I will now find more time to write and share my experiences. But I will not take this for granted. I have no idea what my son will decide to do in the future, and I already know my daughter plans to study for her MCAT at home this summer. So my advice to myself is to enjoy this calmer, quieter period while I can.

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5 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Carol
    Jan 28, 2017 @ 12:24:36

    I can relate as this happens to me twice every year, when my kids come home during seasonal breaks. I love having them here, but about the time we have established our routines and habits, it’s time for them to go again. And so the readjusting period. It’s taking less time for me to get back into my routines though, each time they leave, and having them here when they are able to come is worth the ensuing turmoil.

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  2. Donna Jonas
    Jan 28, 2017 @ 14:28:21

    Related to your comments re empty nester format and projection of returning daughter this coming summer!
    Having lived a long life and experienced the comings and goings of 3 very active young sons, ( one of whom you know extremely well!) I can share with you the memories of “switching modes” from being a couple to being a family again.
    In a way…that period of time is good preparation for what follows in life!
    Flexibility and the opportunity to experience all the iterations of the comings and goings of family members is the name of the game…and lucky are we to be part of that process!
    Enjoy the ride.!
    Love
    MadonnaNana

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  3. themiddlegeneration
    Jan 28, 2017 @ 17:55:22

    Well said. Flexibility and lots of patience at times….You have always shown an enormous amount of both. Thanks!

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  4. Book Club Mom
    Feb 03, 2017 @ 10:38:08

    Great points – we are nearing the empty nest with 2 in college and 2 to go. Life has already changed for us, but I’m still enjoying when they come back!

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